Leaving Micah at 6 months

I was asked by my BFF, Jen, to be her Matron of Honor while I was pregnant with Micah. Little did I know how hard it would be to leave my little one behind for a bachelorette/bridal shower weekend, and boy was it one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. When people say that you won't understand until you have kids, I think it is true. My heart has never been more full than it is now, and leaving him behind, although it was with my husband and his parents, was still very difficult. 

I started packing for Micah a week before my trip. He was heading up to his grandparents' house in the mountains. His dad would get off work, and would be there by the end of the day. 

The longest I had ever left Micah was a few hours here or there, and that was long enough, so I knew it would be torturous for me. 

Knowing that I was going, months in advance I was able to store a healthy stash of breast milk, which helped (a little) to put my mind at ease. Then I had questions like: Will he accept the bottle every time? Will I be able to pump successfully when away? Will Micah be miserable without me, and be a handful? Will he still nurse when I return?

I rented a car for the trip, and when my husband drove me to pick it up, I finally cried. It wasn't the pretty teary-eyed crying either. I straight-up bawled my eyes out.

But you know what? He survived. He was just fine. He sucked down those bottles full of my carefully stored milk! For some reason he even slept better than when I am around. I am still trying to figure out why. These are my thoughts: maybe it was cooler there, and he likes the cold (my husband wouldn't pay for it to be that cold ;) ), maybe he drank more milk than I provide him at each session, maybe he doesn't need to be wrapped up in a swaddle anymore (his arms are out), maybe he senses I am around and I baby him more than Conrad, or maybe there is no answer and he is just young? I wish I knew, and hopefully I will be back to tell you all about it. 
In the meantime, I have been trying to analyze his schedule to come up with some kind of solution. 

Anyway, it was a lot harder on me than it was on him. I pumped every three hours, apart from the nighttime where I pumped once at 3:30 a.m. (YIKES!!) I probably didn't have to do it so much, but I was so afraid of losing my supply that I thought it was absolutely necessary. 

Steph and I drove up there (Colorado) and we ended up having a great time!! I just don't know if I would advise anyone to leave their breastfed baby at six months. It is a lot of work, and a lot of stress for the mama, and that is with an easy baby…I don't know if I would leave a somewhat difficult baby! Especially if I knew he/she wasn't good at taking the bottle. 

I'm glad that I have an easy baby so that I was able to spend such an important weekend with Jen. 

My next post will be on nighttime sleep struggles.

Love you, Jen, you know you were worth it! ;)